Last Chemo

Every one asked me "What are you doing special for your last day of chemo?"  Uh....nothing.  To me, it was not a special day.  Anti-climatic.  I am thankful to be done, but was not in a partying mood.  I got a free t-shirt-no lie-that says I SURVIVED CHEMOTHERAPY.  OK.  It was sweet.  I think I will not wear it in public.  But I can sleep in it.  It is just a big red target for more people to come approach me in HEB.  Lol

I adore my team of nurses at the St. Joseph Cancer Clinic. (I think they have talked Cassidy into a new line of work)  I love my oncologist, Dr. Fleener.  They are all blessings to me.  Probably saved my life.  In 7 days of finding the tumor, myself, I was in an oncologist office and had a plan.  That is pretty rare.  I know my ob/gyn and surgeon worked hard to get me into the best team possible.

I am pretty sure the reason I am not in a partying mood is because I know the second half of this battle comes in the surgical room on November 1.  My tumor has not shrunk down to a 1.8 or 2.2 as we thought but is predicted to be a 2.6, still half of the original amount.  This means the surgeon still has to cut a cm. in diameter around that to attempt to get clear margins.  He said we will not know until 3-4 days after surgery if they are clear.  If they are-great, I go to the next step-30 cycles of radiation.  If not, more surgery and it will look more like a mastectomy.  But Fleener is pretty confident that the 2.6 measurement is off and he can get clear margins anyway.

So I am confident that surgery will just happen like its going to happen and we will pray for clear margins. It's going to be in God's hands.  I control nothing.