Monday, September 17, 2012

4 more to go...

I was stuck in chemo lab today for many hours.  They were double booked.  So when I got there at 11:00, I had to wait until 2 pm to get into a chair.  You learn a lot when you wait that long.  It is VERY disheartening to learn that people are there for their 2nd or 3rd time through cancer.  It comes up in conversation when you are waiting that long or you over hear people discussing it.  "I had breast cancer  6 years ago, now I have uterine cancer."  Me and my friend, who are first timers (and hopefully last timers) are sitting there sinking further and further into our chairs wanting to disappear.

There were very old people in the chemo ward today.  I don't know if I was in my 60's or beyond and sick (they look sick) if I would put my body would through what I am putting mine through or not.  It is a judgment call, I guess.  I am not sure I would do this again, period.  Your body takes a brutal beating.  My friend and I were talking about this (as we were sitting there for HOURS).  It is do-able but rough.  People call me "strong" and "inspiring"....I am neither.  I cry the night before chemo.  EVERY TIME.  So does she-which oddly enough makes me feel better.  There are people that it doesn't faze.

When you get home from chemo, you want to sleep but you can't because of the steroids.  You don't have the energy because of the chemo.

No comments:

Post a Comment